These Nights

I remember when I was little and thought ahead to my future I always had certain things in mind. I always thought that in high school I'd spend endless nights out late with friends, have boyfriends, have endless movie marathons, shop all the time, and so on. Now that I'm actually in high school, and over half way done with it, these things obviously aren't what actually happen. But last night was one of those nights that fit my younger observations and thoughts. After our basketball game, I went to hospi with the team. And a bunch of guys came too. And it was plenty fun! Jaci drooling over the black guy that was talking to us from across the room, getting free mozzarella sticks and cheese curds(which they had claimed to be out of), Kristian and Froelich playing with toy cars, and almost getting yelled at by a police officer/security guy. It was just an overall fun time! I wish I had more times like these. I want these types of things to be the times I look back on when I'm older. I want to remember these nights when I was care free and had endless fun with friends.

Family Galore!

With Christmas not being to far behind us all, I thought I'd mention the oddities(is that a word?!) of my family! I don't even know where to begin honestly. I'm just going to include the events that occurred over the most recent visits...

Dad's Side

• going to my grandparent's favorite pizza joint and waiting over an hour for my pizza
• we stayed there so long because they were convinced it'd be out any second
• my grandma calling my aunt because she had missed her call earlier, only to end up hanging up on her
• my grandpa calling my aunt to explain to her what we were doing
• he had to explain this all in his very drunken manner
• my grandpa reaching over several times to honk the horn while my dad is driving through downtown La Crosse
• this includes going past the county jail
• my grandpa rolling down the windows of our van to blast Christmas music as we drive through the Rotary Lights in Riverside Park
• my grandma, mom, sister, and I all playing "Words with Friends" on Facebook for at least 5 hours straight together
• my dad driving around my grandparent's block to honk again as we left town
• and many, many more fun memories were created at my dad's side!!

Mom's Side

• getting forced into my grandma's kitchen of her new cafe to watch the cook make a hamburger
• my cousin ignored the gift we gave him because he already got what he wanted for Christmas and didn't need anything else
• he's only 3 and was satisfied with what he already had!
• my grandma's coworker's husband showed us all a "stake" mealworm
• more deer hunters came into the shop to get tagged
• my aunt's new husband's family decided to have their Christmas dinner in the cafe, so we got kicked out
• my grandma didn't wrap our presents
• she through them into a bag and didn't even label them, we just got to pick whatever we wanted
• and our gifts were basically pajama pants from Aeropostale and chocolate
• my grandpa left without saying good bye, again

 Well there you have it! My dysfunctional family life! Sometimes I wonder how I'm related to any of them.. But I have my quirks too!

Changing

Today I saw the movie New Year's Eve and there was a quote I absolutely loved! 

"Make your what ifs of tomorrow into what will be." 

I need to stop sitting around waiting for things to happen and take charge of my life. I need to make things happen. I can't sit around and expect others to be able to read my mind and get things figured out for me. I need to start changing.

Holiday Stress

Well the holiday seasons are usually busier, aren't they? I don't remember last Christmas season being QUITE this busy! I'm stressed beyond belief! Today, I left the house at 7 am for Stage One at Mackinaw's and then just got home at 10 pm from basketball! At least I got my license on Tuesday! Woot Woot! I love having that freedom so much, even though all I've done so far is basically drive from home to school to Stage One events. Hopefully this weekend I use this new freedom well, and can go shopping for people's Christmas presents!

I feel terrible about that actually! I don't have anyone's presents! I think I'm going to steal Ana's idea and make homemade baked goods. Because A. I don't have time for anything else and B. I have very little money! So to all of my dear friends: I love each and everyone of you dearly, but I'm afraid the stress of the holidays has caught up with me, and your presents will be on the lower end of the money scale and be made from the heart instead. I hope you understand! Even if they're a smidgity bit late!

Well, off to go do MORE homework! How terrible!

Tis The Season

Yes, it's finally Christmas time! Shopping, Presents, Caroling, and most importantly Jesus. That's what it's all about isn't it? His birth! 

With the help of Stage One, I've definitely gotten into the Christmas spirit this year! I love our cantata this year, and the people as well! I feel so close with everyone in the group! Plus it's great spending so much of my time with so many musically talented people! I mean look at this bunch! Don't we look great!

Stage One 2011: Jordan, Daniel, Travis, Nathan, Jared, Sterling, Colton, Adam, Nina, Molly, Erin, Sadie, Becca, Jana, Ana, Sarah, Abby, and Me!

I'm so glad I get to spend so much time with these people. I feel so blessed to get to share Christ's message with so many people and be a witness for His good news!

Turning To You

I know I'm supposed to turn to God with all of my problems and troubles. But I'm human, and often don't do this. I've learned over a few recent events that this needs to change. I want to be a person that looks to Him no matter what the situation. And so I'm going to work really REALLY hard on that from now on, because the only way to get better at this is to do it. 

God, I'm turning to you from now on. I know I've been making a lot of mistakes recently, and I'm yours. I can't imagine where I would be without your heaps of blessings you've given me. It's time I give you the respect and come to you when I need it, like you deserve. I'm finally giving it all up to you.

Like I should have a long time ago.

Betrayed

This has probably been the worst weekend of my life. 

Everything changed. My thought process. My views of others. Everything.

I don't know who or what to believe anymore. In fact I feel completely betrayed by someone I thought I was super close with.

I guess I'm beginning to question who my real friends are again.

I posted something on Facebook and put out a few desperate Tweets, and I things changed there too.

I learned who is going to be there for me when it feels like everything is going wrong. At least I still have a few people I can still rely on and trust. Hopefully I keep them close.

Now I need to keep my focus on God, and keep looking on Him. Because He won't betray me. No matter what happens in the future, He will guide me through all of the pain and suffering. And it will all end eventually.