Finished!

Well, I've finally finished painting my room! I'm pretty sure this project started my sophomore year..
I still need to choose pictures to put into the frames and paint the frames, but that won't take much time at all. I just need a few suggestions for pictures!

Right Decision

Well, I gave in.
I couldn't not play.
I'm definitely glad I decided to.
Tuesday we played Kohler and won 52-18! I played more than I thought I would actually, only bad thing. I'm probably the only person on the team that doesn't contribute scoring wise.
So this afternoon I think I'm going to go to the gym and shoot and shoot and shoot. I need to make my playing time worth while for the coaches or they will stop putting me in...
I'm definitely glad I decided to play.

I love my team..

Research Paper

So, I should be writing a reseach paper for college writing. Can you guess why I'm not?
Yep, that's right. I'm already sick of it.
I woke up today at 11:30, and by noon I pulled out the backpack and started to work on this paper. So far what I've accomplished has been finding all of my sources and taking notes on most of them. Other than that, this wonderful iPad has provided plenty of distractions.
So, after compiling all of my sources, I managed to take a short "string cheese and water" break.
I now have two sentences done of my introduction paragraph! Aren't I productive?
Well, I ought to get back to this paper before I get distracted again.
Oops, too late.

Lillah

Everytime I hear the good ole' Lutheran hymn, "How Great Thou Art," I think of my great grandma, Lillah Hovland. I never said goodbye the right way to her. I've been holding that in my heart ever sine her funeral. At her funeral we sang this. 

Friday we sang it mixed with "How Great is Our God." I almost cried in assembly. I don't know how I held it in. But I miss her so much. I can't wait until the day comes and I get to see her again.

Oh Lord my God

When I in awesome wonder

Consider all the worlds

Thy hands have made

I see the stars

I hear the rolling thunder

Thy power throughout

The universe displayed

Then sings my soul

My Savior, God, to Thee

How great thou art

How great thou art

Then sings my soul

My Savior, God, to Thee

How great Thou art

How great Thou art

When through the woods

And forest glades I wander

I hear the birds

Sing sweetly in the trees;

When I look down

From lofty mountain grandeur

And hear the brook

And feel the gentle breeze;

Then sings my soul

My Savior, God, to Thee

How great thou art

How great thou art

Then sings my soul

My Savior, God, to Thee

How great Thou art

How great Thou art 

I think of God, 

His son not sparing, 

Sent Him to die,

I scarce can take it in;

That on the cross, my burden

gladly bearing He bled and died 

to take away my sin

Then sings my soul

My Savior, God, to Thee

How great thou art

How great thou art

Then sings my soul

My Savior, God, to Thee

How great Thou art

How great Thou art

When Christ shall come

With shout of acclamation

And take me home

What joy shall fill my heart

Then I shall bow

With humble adoration

And then proclaim My God

How great Thou art

Then sings my soul

My Savior, God, to Thee

How great Thou art

How great Thou art

Then sings my soul

My Savior, God, to Thee

How great Thou art

How great Thou art
How great Thou art

In honor of my dear great grandma, I plan to get "How Great Thou Art" tattooed onto my ribs.
I miss you.

Clean Room

Katherine is getting confirmed this Sunday as an adult member of an LCMS congregation. This is obviously a big deal for my family, with my dad's job and all.
So, of course, we have to have family over. Yippee.
That means cleaning. This past weekend I spent quite a bit of time cleaning my room so it's up to par with my parents' standards. I've made a lot of progress!
The few of you that had seen my room in it's rather dirty state would be impressed! As of now it looks like this...

Miss You

I Miss...

• our movie nights
• cuddling
• driving around doing nothing
• going to parks and acting like we were little kids again
• texting for hours about absolutely nothing
• driving to Appleton, just for you
• Nerf wars
• talking to my grandparents about you
• building forts
• listening to 80s tunes
• annoying my parents about stupid facts about you
• dinner with your family
• watching your soccer games
• picking out what animal to steal from the zoo
• being terrible at disc golf together
• holding your hand
• you being the reason I smiled
• playing video games
• tickle fights
• telling my friends about us
• daydreaming of our next date
• your smell
• going swimming and being attacked from behind
• watching fireworks
• jumping fences
• your odd sense of humor
• talking about superheroes
• feeling like I belonged
• FaceTime dates
• debating about squirrels
• going to concerts
• you.

I Can't Believe

Basketball starts in a week.. 

And I'm not playing this year.

I can't believe I made that decision. It sort of makes me nauseous just thinking about it.

It's hard to believe I'll have so much time this winter to spend with myself. I honestly can't even wrap my mind around the idea of it.

Part of me really wants to play this year, but knows I cant because it'll be "giving in" and showing that I'm weak and won't stand behind my word.

But the other part of me knows it wouldn't be good for me to play. I don't think I'd be mentally stable enough to. The few people I've told using that exact phrasing don't believe me. But I really don't think I'm in a good place to be spending so much extra time doing things that won't pertain to my future.

One huge thing that sucks about me sticking with this decision of not playing, is that one main reason I wasn't going to play this year was so I could spend more time with Caleb. Obviously those plans aren't going to hold up the way they'd originally been intended. I guess that will be something I really work out in my alone time with myself.

Wise Words

At the end of this summer, after Caleb broke up with me, my mom gave me some wise words to think about..

I'd broken into tears because he'd told me we were over just twenty minutes before. My mom had just gotten home from grocery shopping, so I went to the kitchen to help unload the bags. I burst into tears and my mom said, "He broke up with you didn't he?" I snuffled a yes somehow.

She said, "I'm sorry. A broken heart sucks. You'll get over it."

Those were my mom's "wise words" when it came down to boy issues.

The thing is, I'm not over it yet. She doesn't realize it, but I'm learning everyday how much more I miss him. Sometimes I just hope I'll wake up and this whole beginning of this year will have been a dream. 

This year has gone nothing like I thought it would.

I came up with all of these great ideas this summer. And seriously only ONE of them has happened. I don't know how I'm going to make it through the rest of this year.

I really hope somehow he'll take me back. I realize how he saw me as such a bad girlfriend. I see where he was coming from. I just don't know how to tell him I want a second chance.

Maybe I'll learn by the end of the year how to apply my mom's advice. 

But for now, I most certainly do not.